Untitled Actress from Dark Sparkler by Amber Tamblyn
Submission calls for an actress mid-to-late 20s. All ethnicities acceptable. Except Asian-American. Caucasian preferable. Must read teen on-screen. Thin but not gaunt. Lean. Quirky but not unattractive. No brown eyes. Not taller than 5’5”. Weight no more than 109. Actress should have great smile. Straight teeth a must. Must be flexible. Small bust a plus. Can do own stunts. Will waive rights to image, likeness, publicity, and final cut. Role calls for nudity.

Role calls for simulated sexual intercourse. Role calls for role play with lead male. No stand-in avail. Role pays scale.

Character is shy yet codependent, searching for love in all the wrong men. Character confides in others at her own risk. Character is fatigued and hollow, suffers from self-doubt, a sense of worthlessness. Character learns the hard way to believe in herself. No brown eyes. Character finally finds happiness when she meets Brad, a successful older businessman, 5’5”.

Log line: A woman fights to save her soul. Think a young Carole Lombard meets a younger Anna Nicole. Requires an actress that will leave an audience speechless, who’s found her creative voice.

Not a speaking role.

Like actresses, a few stand-out teachers get acknowledgement for excellence or atrociousness; however, we are replaceable in the eyes of most. We don’t do anything real. We choose careers that force us to a different social contract that most professionals. Young women (and young men) who choose acting have to look good: they spend hours at the gym, carefully monitor their food, and deal with all the people who look over their shoulders telling them how to live their lives better. Teachers may not spend hours at the gym, but we read, we learn, we plan, we assess, we adjust, we deal with all the bullshit from people who think our jobs aren’t worth their time. I get awfully sick of “those who can’t do teach”.

Let’s be real. In order to teach writing effectively I spent ten years working with the Oregon Writing Project. I write in my online journal, my notebooks, and occasionally my blog so that I can go through the same experiences as my students even if it’s on a different front. I can tell them how I get through writer’s block or why word vomit is such an important step in the writing process. I can tell them why I read my work out loud when I’m proofreading. I may not be Stephen King or a community college professor with several small press books, but I am still a writer. I am definitely a teacher. And while I could go out and do other things, this is what I love.

I just wish more people would listen. I’m sure the average actor or actress wish the same.


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